體味擁有，心滿(mǎn)意足Think More about What You Have

佚名/Anonymous

One of the most pervasive and destructive mental tendencies I've seen is that of focusing on what we want instead of what we have. It doesn't seem to make any difference how much we have；we just keep expanding our list of desires, which guarantees¹we will remain dissatisfied.The mind-set that says"I'll be happy when this desire is fulfilled"is the same mind-set that will repeat itself once that desire is met.

We want this or that. If we don't get what we want, we keep thinking about all that we don't have and we remain dissatisfied.If we do get what we want, we simply recreate the same thinking in our new circumstances².So, despite getting what we want, we still remain unhappy.Happiness can't be found when we are yearning for new desires.

Luckily, there is a way to be happy. It involves changing the emphasis³of our thinking from what we want to what we have.Rather than wishing your spouse was different, try thinking about her wonderful qualities.Instead of complaining⁴about your salary, be grateful that you have a job.Rather than wishing you were able to take a vacation to Hawaii, think of how much fun you have had close to home.The list of possibilities is endless！Each time you notice yourself falling into the"I wish life were different"trap, back off and start over.Take a breath and remember all that you have to be grateful.&nbsp；When you focus not on what you want, but on what you have, you end up getting more of what you want anyway.If you focus on the good qualities of your spouse, she'll be more loving.If you are grateful for your job rather than complaining about it, you'll do a better job, be more productive, and probably end up getting a raise any-way.If you focus on ways to enjoy yourself around home rather than waiting to enjoy yourself in Hawaii, you'll end up having more fun.If you ever do get to Hawaii, you'll be in the habit of enjoying yourself.And, if by some chance you don't, you'll have a great life anyway.

Make a note to yourself to start thinking more about what you have than what you want. If you do, your life will start appearing much better than before.For perhaps the first time in your life, you'll know what it means to feel satisfied.

專(zhuān)注于我們想得到的，而不是我們所擁有的，這是我見(jiàn)過(guò)的一種最具普遍性和破壞性的心理趨向。我們擁有多少，似乎并無(wú)太大區(qū)別，我們欲望的清單不斷擴(kuò)充，使我們永遠(yuǎn)不滿(mǎn)足。“當(dāng)我實(shí)現(xiàn)了這個(gè)愿望，就會(huì)快樂(lè)。”一旦這個(gè)欲望得到滿(mǎn)足，以后還會(huì)出現(xiàn)相同的欲求心理。

我們想要這個(gè)或那個(gè)。如果得不到，就會(huì)不斷地去想那些沒(méi)有的東西，總是感到不滿(mǎn)足。而如果得到了，在新的條件下，我們又產(chǎn)生同樣的心理。所以，盡管我們得到了，還是不開(kāi)心。如果我們一味地渴求新的欲望，將無(wú)法找到幸福。

幸運(yùn)的是，我們想要獲得幸福，有這樣一種方法：轉(zhuǎn)換我們思考的重心，從想要的轉(zhuǎn)移到擁有的。我們可以試著去想伴侶的可貴品質(zhì)，而不去希求她該如何與現(xiàn)在不同；可以為自己擁有一份工作充滿(mǎn)感激，而不去抱怨薪水太低；可以設(shè)想閉門(mén)在家的種種樂(lè)趣，而不是渴望去夏威夷度假。可以這樣去考慮的事物無(wú)窮無(wú)盡！一旦你意識(shí)到自己又陷入這個(gè)思維陷阱：“我希望生活不是這樣”時(shí)，要退后一步，重新思考，深呼吸，想想你所擁有的。這樣，感激之情便會(huì)油然而生。當(dāng)你關(guān)注的不再是自己想要的，而是所擁有的時(shí)，你最終得到的一定會(huì)比想要的更多；如果你關(guān)注伴侶的優(yōu)秀品德，她就會(huì)更可愛(ài)；如果你對(duì)工作充滿(mǎn)感激，而不是抱怨，你會(huì)做得更好，工作效率更高，薪水也可能提高；如果你在家能自得其樂(lè)，而不是等著去夏威夷享受，你會(huì)找到更多的樂(lè)趣。假設(shè)你真的去了夏威夷，往往會(huì)更快樂(lè)，即使因?yàn)槟撤N偶然沒(méi)能去成，仍然會(huì)過(guò)得開(kāi)心。

記住，從現(xiàn)在開(kāi)始，多想想你擁有的，而不是你想要的。如果你這樣做，你的生活就會(huì)比以前更美好，那種感受或許是你生命中的第一次，你將會(huì)懂得心滿(mǎn)意足的含義。