CONCERNING THE PERFECT WOMAN, AND THEREFORE CONCERNING ALLFEMININE READERS

As I once more got under way, my thoughts slowly loitered back to the theme which had been occupying them before I dropped asleep.

What was my working hypothesis of the Perfect Woman, towards whom I was thus leisurely strolling? She might be defined, Ireflected, as The Woman Who Is Worthy Of Us; but the improbability which every healthily conceited young man must feel of ever finding such a one made the definition seem a little unserviceable.Or, if you prefer, since we seem to be dealing with impossibles, we might turn about and more truly define her as The Woman of Whom We are Worthy, for who dare say that she exists? If, again, she were defined as the Woman our More Fortunate Friend Marries, her unapproachableness would rob the definition of any practical value.Other generalisations proving equally unprofitable, I began scientifically to consider in detail the attributes of the supposititious paragon,--attributes of body and mind and heart.This was soon done; but again, as Ithus conned all those virtues which I was to expect united in one unhappy woman, the result was still unsatisfying, for I began to perceive that it was really not perfection that I was in search of.As I added virtue after virtue to the female monster in my mind, and the result remained still inanimate and unalluring, Irealised that the lack I was conscious of was not any new perfection, but just one or two honest human imperfections.And this, try as I would, was just what I could not imagine.

For, if you reflect a moment, you will see that, while it is easy to choose what virtues we would have our wife possess, it is all but impossible to imagine those faults we would desire in her, which I think most lovers would admit add piquancy to the loved one, that fascinating wayward imperfection which paradoxically makes her perfect.

Faults in the abstract are each and all so uninviting, not to say alarming, but, associated with certain eyes and hair and tender little gowns, it is curious how they lose their terrors; and, as with vice in the poet's image, we end by embracing what we began by dreading.You see the fault becomes a virtue when it is hers, the treason prospers; wherefore, no doubt, the impossibility of imagining it.What particular fault will suit a particular unknown girl is obviously as difficult to determine as in what colours she will look her best.